Don’t Judge and Drive

I have to admit. I wasn’t paying as much attention as I should have. I was on the phone (albeit hands free!).

I was at the corner of the intersection of Parkway and Main Street.

Let me tell you about this intersection. If you want to go south at that intersection, there is only one lane. If you want to turn left to go south, you cannot be out in the intersection at all, or you will make it very difficult for the cars that are turning left coming from the north (going east) to get around you.

This is the single lane heading south

I was in that turn lane coming from the east to turn south where you cannot be out in the intersection.

The white Ethra bus is where I was. Notice that it is several feet behind the line. I was about that far in front of the line.

Earlier, I had noticed that a cop had come by and gone south, but I hadn’t paid that much attention to what he was doing.

The left turn signal turned green, and I was ready to head south. So, I began pulling out into the intersection.

Then, uh-oh. There was a stationary semi that sitting in the only lane going south. I could not turn, but I was already out in the intersection a little ways.

Never mind. I’ll back up. Uh-oh. There’s a truck right on my tail. I’m stuck. I can’t go anywhere.

The light turned yellow then red. Still, I could not move. There was nothing I could do.

Finally, it came time for the cars coming from the north to attempt to turn left and go around me. It was not easy.

I got nasty look after nasty look. Several cars gave a long honk on their horn.

There’s one of two possibilities here. They may have seen the semi blocking my turn, and then they thought I was an idiot for trying to turn; or, they didn’t see it, and they just thought I was an idiot who just wanted to make their lives difficult.

I thought, come on people, it’s either an innocent mistake or an impossible situation.

At that moment, I thought of all the times I had honked my horn at other cars. I wondered, how many times have I honked the horn without realizing all that was going on? Probably quite a few.

A good lesson for me. Don’t judge and drive.

3 Principles for Speaking into Your Child’s Life

There are a large variety of areas in which you need to speak into your child’s life. You need to help them with finances, schooling, jobs, God, ethics, relationships, and so on.

In each of these areas, you need specific wisdom and insight into how to speak well to them. I like to develop little phrases that I can go back to again and again. Some I invent. Others I borrow. In most sports, one of the keys is “keep your eye on the ball,” which is a good life principle as well.

However, there are several ways of relating to our children that apply to any and every situation. Let me suggest three of them.

Value them
First, value your children. Children can be overwhelming. It’s easy to see the things that you could be doing if you didn’t have them.

Children can cause you trouble and pain. They have their own minds and wills. They don’t always follow you or do the things that you like. They sometimes decide to get angry or do crazy things in public. Let’s be honest. It can be wearying at times.

It’s so important that we don’t let the struggles cause us to miss what a blessing they are. The Bible tells us, “Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them” (Psalm 127:3, 5).

Be Present
Second, be a calm presence in their lives.

This has two parts. First, we need to be a presence in their lives. Quantity of time matters. We can’t just show up when there’s a problem. We need to be developing relationships with them.

The second part is that we need to be a calm presence. We should not let the children bear the brunt of our anxiety. There are ways to resolve anxiety. Dumping on our children is not a good one.

Think of Jesus and the disciples. He had opportunities to speak into the disciples’ lives because He was with them constantly. He was also a calm presence in their lives, even while they were really struggling.

Teach Them
Third, do teach them.

It’s easy to think that we might not have much to offer or that you have no influence. You do. Your children do listen, and you have much to teach. God has put you in the position of parent in large part for the very purpose of helping your child learn how to live.

Whatever other things you do in discipline, let the majority of your shaping of their lives be through conversation, discussion, and instruction.

The Bible tells us, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4).

The book of Proverbs is a great guide. The book is basically a father teaching his child about the consequences of various actions.

Conclusion
These are rather simple principles. I find, though, that the most important principles are generally the simplest.

What are some general principles that you might offer for speaking into our children’s lives?

10 Ways the Church Needs to Reform, if the Simple Gospel Is Central

At the heart of the Reformation is justification by faith alone. This means that, though human beings stand guilty and condemned, God offers acceptance as a free gift based on what Jesus has done. Closely related is the fact that God also transforms those who are justified to make them more like Jesus (often called sanctification).

This is the simple Gospel that was emphasized and put back at the center of the church by Martin Luther and the other Reformers.

This is what had first place in the New Testament Church: “For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance[a]: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures” (1 Cor. 15:3–4).

It’s still easy for us to make other things of secondary, tertiary, or no importance central. I still struggle to keep the simple Gospel central. For a long time in my ministry, I did a terrible job of it. Even when I preached the simple Gospel, my actions often said that other things were just as important or more important.

When I left New Covenant Presbyterian in Spearfish in 2015, I preached from 1 Cor. 15:3–4. I explained ten things that I had tried to do, ten reforms that I had tried to make that were based on making the simple gospel central. I said, whatever else I had done, this was my vision and what I had wanted to do.

A man in the church came over to me afterwards and said, “You need to make that the first sermon you preach at your next church.” I changed what I was preaching on based on his advice.

And this is still my vision. This Sunday, I’m preaching on the Reformation. It’s on justification by faith alone. I’m going to share 10 reforms I think the church needs to make, if the simple gospel is central to her life.

  1. If the simple gospel is central, then it gives us an outward focus. The people outside the church are not that different from us. They are just one act of faith away from being fundamentally where we are.
  2. If the simple gospel is central, then all that is necessary to be a member of the church is to embrace the simple gospel. We can’t make entrance into the church higher than entering into the kingdom of God. This is what captivated me in Presbyterian history. Presbyterians aren’t perfect, but they have historically understood this.
  3. If the simple gospel is central, then we cannot let other preferences or other truths crowd it out. If other doctrines, ethical principles, church principles, or anything else gets talked about more than the simple gospel, people will believe what you talk about is the most central. We should not do that.
  4. If the simple gospel is central, then everything we do must be formatted around it. We cannot say one thing & then show another. We can’t say Christ’s love is free and then not care whether or not people can find our building. We can’t say Christ is hospitable but then be inhospitable.
  5. If the simple gospel is central, there is unity of believers in the local church. We may be at different levels in our spiritual journey or knowledge, but we all sit down around the table and let Jesus wash our feet. That gives us a powerful unity.
  6. If the simple gospel is central, then the church is composed of a variety of people from a variety of different backgrounds at a variety of different levels. Each should be valued as a believer in Christ. Thus, the worship and the sermons should be designed to include everybody and give them all sense of being part of the people of God.
  7. If the simple gospel is central, then we will value children in our church because the simple gospel is simple enough for a child to grasp and embrace.
  8. If the simple gospel is central, there is a unity with all believers. It is no longer just about the believers in our church, it is about believers everywhere because we all believe together that which we value most.
  9. If the simple gospel is central, then we can and should work together with all churches who preach this simple gospel. We share a basic unity that transcends other differences.
  10. If the simple gospel is central, then this is what we need most in order to grow. We must preach the gospel to ourselves when we see our sin, when we need guidance, when we are struggling with our circumstances, and when we are struggling with people. What does Paul write to the churches? The Gospel.

The Reformation was about clarifying the Gospel and bringing it back to the center of the church. This is not a completed act. It is not a pristine period in history. It is a continual call to make Christ and Him crucified the center of our lives, churches, and hearts.

4 Verses Christians Turn to After a Mass Shooting

After what occurred Sunday in Las Vegas, whose heart cannot be heavy? As a Pastor, I struggle with what to say and how to respond to these types of tragedies.

Christianity Today posted an article yesterday that cited 4 verses that Christians turn to after mass shootings. I found that these verses were particularly helpful to me, and so I decided to re-post them here for your meditation:

  • John 16:33: “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
  • Psalm 34:18: “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
  • Romans 12:19: “Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
  • Psalm 11:5 “The Lord examines the righteous, but the wicked, those who love violence, he hates with a passion.”

To see how they came up with these verses and links to other helpful articles, see CT’s whole article here.

For those questioning how a good God could allow suffering, I offer my summary of Tim Keller’s insights in his book The Reason for God here.

Questions & Answers on Leadership Issues

This month, I’ve preached on the topic of leadership. I’ve preached it on because I believe that in the Bible, after the Bible, in leadership positions and without leadership positions, God uses leaders. If we see a problem in the world, we should pray for our leaders, pray that God will raise up leaders, and consider leading.

Anyone can be a leader. We just need a vision of what needs to be done and the wisdom to explain it to people, do the hard things that are necessary to get there, meet people where they are, and remember that it’s a process.

In all of this, we can be assured of God’s great promise to those whom He calls to lead, “I will be with you.”

Several people in my congregation asked me questions about leadership. You can listen to some of the questions and my replies here. You can read the questions and replies below.

What do you when people won’t follow you?
First, always ask first, what’s wrong with my leadership? before you ask, what’s wrong with my followers? Second, there are sometimes that we can’t lead people forward, and we have to recognize our own human limitations and give up. Third, there are some people we have to lead that are difficult to lead. Don’t give up. Keep praying, loving, and looking for ways to move the ball down the field. You never know when God may give a breakthrough!

What is leadership success?
You can look at leadership success in a couple of different ways. You can see success in terms of an objective, e.g., did I get people to the church to clean it before Sunday? In terms of the objective, sometimes you fail. It’s important to see that our value is not based on what we accomplish but on God’s value of us and desires to use us. That doesn’t change, even if we fail. Continue reading “Questions & Answers on Leadership Issues”