Keeping Sane and Productive in an Insane World, Principle # 4: Don’t Be Passive. Make Goals; Carry Them out.

Principle #4: Don’t Be Passive. Make Goals; Carry Them out.

When life gets difficult, it’s easy to enter into passive mode. It’s easy to act helpless. Life is just bad, and there is no way out, we might think. There’s nothing we can do about it. It’s comforting in its own way. If I can do nothing to change the world, I am relieved of all responsibility.

The problem is that it’s not true. Things can change. Situations can change. Families can change. People can change.

It’s not easy. Changing ourselves and our communities is hard work. That’s why it’s easy to give up. There is resistance.

But there is something that can change things: human activity. We were not made to be passive. We were made to be active. When God created human beings, He said, “Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth” (Gen. 1:28). In other words, don’t be passive with this good world. Make it something better. Be active. Make goals. Carry them out.

God repeated substantially the same thing after the fall of man into sin. It wasn’t just for the unfallen world that God made man to be active. He said that we should do all work like you are doing it for the greatest purpose imaginable, glorifying God. “And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him” (Col. 3:17).

It’s easy to be passive in the face of difficult situations. You may have tried to go to the gym before, but you gave up. So, you think it’s impossible. You may have worked on your relationship with your spouse, and nothing seemed to come of it. So, you stopped working on it. You may have tried to learn to play the piano, and nothing came of it. So, you are confirmed in your passivity.

But there are things you can do. You can keep working at it. You can keep tilling the ground, fertilizing it, and caring for it. In time, a seed will sprout and grow into something beautiful.

Don’t give up because you tried one goal and didn’t succeed. Think of different ways to do it. Here’s an example. You may have wanted to improve your relationship with your child. So, you asked them to sit down and talk to you. They didn’t like it. It didn’t get anywhere.

But you can change your approach to talking to your kids. A friend of mine realized that if he went into the rooms of his children with their permission, they would open up in a way that they would never do in the living room. I have found that to be true as well. It’s a remarkable thing. Make it a goal to go down to your child’s room and talk to them on their turf a couple of times a week. See what happens.

Another friend of mine played guitar in a band. I had recently started working on the guitar, and we had a discussion about it. One thing he said was that I should not have my guitar in a case under my bed. Instead, I should have it out on a stand. That way, I could just grab it. He also said that I should make it my goal to practice a mere five minutes a day. I did all that. I practiced more often and usually for much longer than five minutes a day.

You can apply this to exercise. Don’t make it your goal to go to the gym. Make it your goal to exercise five minutes a day in your house with small weights or calisthenics. You will probably do it longer. Either way, you will start to get used to exercising. This will develop a habit. It will be easier to expand from there.

Whatever you want to do or are concerned about, you have options. You can drop the passivity, get active, and start to make a difference. Even if things don’t turn out how you would like, you will be happy that you did something to make yourself better and learn rather than being a passive spectator.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I hope it encourages you to be active in the face of your problems. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this article in the comments below. If you like it, subscribe in the box below or share this article on social media. I hope to see you here again.

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Photo by Dave Ruck on Unsplash

How to Plan a Trip Outside the United States

If someone asked me to plan a trip to Pigeon Forge/Gatlinburg, I could give them a large list of things to do and places to visit without thinking. It’s where I live and work. But what about a country that you’ve never visited? What do you do? Where do you start? What if you don’t speak the language? Fortunately, there are innumerable tools available to help you plan an amazing trip outside the United States.

For me, a big part of the joy of the trip is planning the trip. You discover each place and what it has to offer. There are so many options that you can choose from. There is so much research that can be done online. I loved spending weeks studying the various places in Scotland that we could visit and then finding hotels, discovering the sites, and seeing the places, all online.

I planned an entire two week trip to Scotland. We were going to go around the island, visiting the Isle of Skye, various ancestral castles, Edinburgh, and the rest. Every time I think about planning that trip, it makes me happy. I felt like I understood the island much better for doing so. For example, during the planning process, I met a guy from Scotland. He told me that he was from Dundee. I knew where that was because of my research. I understood the world a little bit better, even without going.

Planning the trip to Egypt was totally different. We found a company called Memphis Tours (for Memphis, Egypt not Memphis, Tennessee). They had several itineraries, but they could change them to fit your priorities. A representative would work with a prospective traveler to adjust their trip. I highly recommend them. They do things a little bit differently than an American company might, but they get the job done and really care for their travelers. The first itinerary I considered was a trip to Turkey and Egypt. Both were open to American travelers in the winter of 2021. I thought it would be truly epic to visit both those countries. The problem was lining up all the flights for the right days. We could not make it work in the time frame that we had. So, we decided to do a grand tour of Egypt, which was actually quite epic anyway.

Flights were perhaps the most important part of the planning process. Once you get there, you can do things. But you have to get there. They are also the most expensive single item. You can save money on flights, or you can spend a lot of money on them. This will determine what you can do and how many trips you can take, unless, of course, you are very rich.

I am not very rich, so I looked for cheap flights. There were several factors that enabled me to find cheaper flights. First, I was generally somewhat flexible in the time I would travel and the place to which I would travel. Second, I used a service called Going (formerly Scott’s Cheap Flights) that would alert me to when cheap flights were available. That way, I did not have to keep checking all the time. Third, I looked not only at my local regional airport but all the international airports within four hours of me: Atlanta, Charlotte, Cincinnati, and Nashville. Sometimes, a 3 or 4 hour drive would be worth it. Often, you did not even lose time. You would have to fly to one of those airports and wait around anyway, so why not drive? The economics of this were important. If I was traveling by myself, and there was only $100 difference in the tickets between Knoxville and Charlotte, it made sense to fly out of Knoxville. If it was a $300 or $400 difference, that was worth considering. In the case of my second trip to Egypt, four of us were going. The difference in the tickets was greater than $400. That was a nearly $1500 difference when you factor in parking and gas.

After that, you have to determine where you want to go when you arrive. Do you travel around? Do you stay primarily in one city? Or at the beach? Once you decide this, then you need to book your hotel. You could also stay in an Airbnb. One interesting thing about international travel is that the Airbnb and hotel costs are quite different than those of the United States. In the U.S., I have found that Airbnbs generally cost more than hotels. In other countries, this is not the case. I stayed in Madrid for a week for less than $50 a night in a small Airbnb apartment with its own bathroom. The hotels were generally $100 or more. I prefer to stay in hotels when I can because I like being able to talk to the staff and the people that are staying there. For example, I stayed in a hotel near the Bogota airport by myself. I felt a little lonely. I went down to get a snack and a drink. I met an American couple who was living in Mexico but had come to Bogota to do a tour during the hotter months of Baja California. It was a great conversation, and I was happy to have some company. But not everybody likes to do this sort of thing.

One phenomenon that you find in other countries that is available in the U.S. but very expensive here is the all inclusive hotel. I knew one couple that was looking at paying $9,000 for one week at an all-inclusive in Florida. You can pay a fraction of that in other Caribbean countries. At the all-inclusive, you pay one price and you get all your meals, all your drinks, all your entertainment, and all your snacks. I am not sure that you actually save money by doing it this way, unless you drink a lot, which many guests at these hotels do. But the all inclusive is fun and easy. I have enjoyed my stay at each one of them. One key thing is to make sure that you get your agreement that all is included in writing before you go. Otherwise, they may try to charge you when you get there.

One thing you also have to do is to plan how you will get around. The American idea would be to take the obvious approach: rent a car. This was my plan for Scotland. I would rent a manual car and drive on the wrong side of the road throughout Scotland. There are generally cheaper ways to get from place to place that are comfortable and easier. One thing to note is that in many countries you can fly from city to city much more cheaply than you can in America. I bought 17 plane tickets for traveling around Colombia that cost me about $500 total. This is exceptionally cheap, but the same thing was true in Spain and other parts of Europe. There were often cheap flights. In Europe, you can take the train. It is often actually cheaper to fly, but it is a bigger hassle, the price difference is not great, and you can enjoy seeing the countryside. I have had few better traveling experiences than traveling in the Ave train in Spain. You can get from Madrid to Seville, at least a 5 hour trip driving, in about 2 hours! In Latin America, you can take buses. We had a very nice trip in a bus from Puerto Plata to Santo Domingo in the Dominican Republic. They often have different options for buses than we have in the United States. There are many more stations than you might find for the Greyhound in the U.S. where they often simply drop you off on the side of the road.

Within the city, there are usually several options for traveling around. You can take a bus, metro, taxi, or Uber. Figuring this out should be part of your planning. For example, in Madrid, there is an extensive metro and bus system that you can ride very cheaply. Tourists can get a tourist ticket. They cost $40 or so per week, and you can ride the metro and the buses an unlimited number of times for a week. You can also purchase the tourist ticket for 1-6 days with a lower cost. This is true in many cities.

Some of my local friends did not recommend that I take some of the public transportation or taxis in various places outside of Europe. They may have been overly cautious. However, what they did recommend was Uber. They said it was much safer. It is also cheap by American standards. I saw $1 and $2 charges on my credit card for my rides in Bogota. A side benefit of Uber, if you speak the language of the driver, is that you often find an interesting person who likes to talk and knows quite a bit about the local situation.

What do you do when you get there? One great resource that I have found is Viator. Viator.com is a web site that will give you an idea of what is available in the area. Even if you don’t use that specific service, it is a great guide that will give you a sample of what is available. This includes traditional things like trips to an island, tours of the pyramids, or tours of a city as well as other experiences such as a tapas tour, salsa lessons, or cooking classes. From this vantage point, you can either reserve your activities or check into other options for the things that you are interested in.

I have had experiences of planning nothing, planning everything, and having everything planned for me. All of these were wonderful experiences. They all have their advantages. In this day and age, don’t think that you need to have someone else do your planning. You can do a lot of it on your own. You may even find that this type of research is fun. . . or you may not. My oldest daughter hates to plan. I love to. This makes for a very good traveling relationship. I put together a plan, have her check it, and then execute it on our trips. Maybe you can find someone like that and bring them along on your next trip.

Thanks for taking the time to read this article. If you like it, please consider sharing it on social media or subscribing to the blog in the box below. Do you have anything you would add to this post? Share it in the comments below. I hope to see you here again or traveling around the world.

Keeping Sane and Productive in an Insane World, Principle #1: Don’t say, “I can’t do that.” Say, “I can’t do that today.”

Principle #1: Don’t say, “I can’t do that.” Say, “I can’t do that today.”

It’s easy to look at hard things and say, “I can’t do that.” That’s only partly true. You can’t do that today. But there are many things that you can’t do today that you could do if you worked at them over a period of time.

Many of the things that we admire in others are things that they worked at for a long time. Obviously, certain people’s bodies are better built for professional football than others, but those who become pro football players have put in thousands of hours of work to get there.

Whether it’s playing an instrument, speaking a foreign language, delivering a speech, writing a book, or running a marathon, these skills take time to develop. You may not be able to run a marathon today, but you could run one if you worked on it over a long period of time.

What is true in the area of physical skills is also true in relationships. You may not feel like you are good at connecting with people. However, you can work at it. You relate better to people. For example, you may think that your relationship with your child is not good. Say instead: it’s not good today, but it can be better in the future, if I work at it. Continue reading “Keeping Sane and Productive in an Insane World, Principle #1: Don’t say, “I can’t do that.” Say, “I can’t do that today.”

5 Steps to Grow in Faith, Hope, and Love for Greater Joy, Peace, and Hope

Key thought: when we grow in the characteristics of faith, hope, and love, we will have greater joy, peace, and hope. But how do we do it?

Over the past couple of months, I have explained that the book of Romans is a book that is designed to lead us to greater joy, peace, and hope. As Paul wrote, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (15:13). This was Paul’s prayer for what this letter would accomplish.

The key to growing in joy, peace, and hope was greater faith in what God had done in Christ to forgive us and will do to transform us. The key was greater hope in a brighter future for ourselves individually and for the world. The key was greater love that would love others better, even when it was hard. The key was growing in the virtues of faith, hope, and love.

Becoming people of greater faith, hope, and love is much harder to do than to say. So, how do we do it? I want to conclude this series on Romans with an explanation of how to grow in faith, hope, and love so we can feel greater joy, peace, and hope. I hope that this will serve as a guide for you to study and review the principles of this great letter to the Roman Christians. This advice is derived from what the Apostle Paul is doing in this letter.

If you want to read the rest of the series, you can read part 1 here, part 2 here, part 3 here, part 4 here, part 5 here, part 6 here, and part 7 here. You can read part 8 here.

How to Grow in Virtue
1. Pray specifically to grow in faith, hope, and love. This is what Paul is doing at the end of his letter in the blessing he declares over them. He is asking God to increase the faith of the Roman Christians. That’s what we should do. We have not because we ask not. Ask, and it will be given you. God delights to give us the gifts of greater faith and love. Pray specifically each day that God will give you faith, the gift that opens the door to all other gifts. Continue reading “5 Steps to Grow in Faith, Hope, and Love for Greater Joy, Peace, and Hope”

How Covid Made Me a World Traveler

In the fall of 2019, I said, “I don’t think I need to travel any more. I enjoy finding adventure right where I am. I think I will just live my life here and not worry about traveling.” I was referring here to travel in the U.S. International travel was completely out of the question. This statement proved to one of the dumbest statements I have ever made.

I had traveled internationally when I was younger. I took three international trips from the time I was 14-19. I went to Israel, Albania, and France. I went to Ontario a couple of times while I studied to be a Pastor, but does that really count as an international trip? Then, for the next 20 years, I took zero international trips. I focused on other things. I got married. I lived in South Dakota. I had seven kids. I pursued higher degrees. It wasn’t the time.

four years after making that statement, I had visited Egypt twice, Mexico three times, Colombia twice, Spain twice, Quebec (that counts), and the Dominican Republic. I had a period of nine months where I went to Colombia, Egypt, Mexico, the Dominican Republic, Spain, and Colombia again.

What changed? Ironically, it was Covid, the thing that stopped international travel for most people. In March 2020, my eldest daughter, Anna (pictured above), was in her junior year. Covid shut down the school, and she did not go back to school the rest of the semester.

In the fall of 2020, schools opened up again here in TN. Anna had a decision to make. Would she do the online option and stay home, or would she attend classes with a mask on? My daughter has a light case of asthma and had struggled at times with breathing well at the old school building in the past. The idea of wearing a mask all day did not appeal to her. So, she tried the online option . . . and hated it. She is a real extrovert who loves to talk to people. Sitting in front of a screen all day did not work for her.

So, what to do? She decided to pursue homeschooling. She had done it in the past, and she thought it would work well in this situation. It was sad for her because she had really enjoyed her three years of high school. Nevertheless, she made that choice and went forward with it. Her senior year was working at an indoor waterpark . . . while wearing a mask. So, it turned out not to be too bad.

When she decided to homeschool, I was sad. I wanted her to experience the exciting events of her senior year: the friends, the celebrations, the special events, the graduation, and the trips. All that was now gone.

Then, I came up with an idea. What if we took a trip together somewhere in the world? In my mind, that would make up for a lot what she lost. So, one day, I said to her, “I think we should do a trip somewhere in the world. Where would you like to go, if you were going to go anywhere in the world?”

She immediately replied, “Scotland.”

I said, “Let’s do it.” Continue reading “How Covid Made Me a World Traveler”